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A Hell-ish history in steel
November 3, 2007
“Hell,” religious convictions notwithstanding, describes a place of extreme pain or misery. “Cell”
depicts an enclosed structure, one that’s commonly associated with a prison. “Hell in a Cell”? Now you’re
talking about something that’s altogether different, and actually far more frightening.
At Survivor Series two weeks from Sunday, our fans will surely apply terms like “epic” and “history-making”
toward the menacing expression, and they’ll be right to do so. However, for World Heavyweight Champion Batista and The
Undertaker, labels like “bloody,” “grueling” and “career-threatening” are more likely
to weigh on their minds as the time for their fifth – and possibly final – battle nears.
Why this match, you ask? Why must The Animal and The Phenom try to settle their revered rivalry locked inside a 20-foot-high
roofed structure composed of unbending steel? Because, quite honestly, both Superstars need to prove who deserves to wear
the gold that currently surrounds Batista’s waist. After tallying one victory apiece and two draws in their four previous
encounters, Hell in a Cell is the definitive place for them to do so.
Throughout WWE’s illustrious history, only 14 occasions have sanctioned this contest of barbaric brutality and widespread
carnage. All have involved, to some degree, either Triple H or The Undertaker, who battled Shawn Michaels in the inaugural
Hell in a Cell. More than a decade after October 1997’s Badd Blood, fans still recall The Showstopper crashing through
the Spanish announce table, and how The Phenom catapulted him face-first into the steel, practically turning HBK’s features
into grated red cheese. The blood-soaked battle would mark the debut of Undertaker’s brother, Kane, who’d cost
The Deadman the victory. However, many also believe this particular “Hell” was a major contributor to a broken
back that cost Michaels more than four years of his career.
Like the padlocked structure itself, it’s difficult to escape Hell in a Cell’s history without referencing Undertaker’s
King of the Ring confrontation with Mankind. Then again, what transpired outside the apparatus made their June 1998 clash
one of the most horrifically entertaining matches in WWE lore. Shortly after suffering a 20-foot drop from the Cell roof onto
the Spanish announcers’ table below, the manic Mankind was chokeslammed through the cage top, onto a thumbtack-covered
ring mat. Not surprisingly, Undertaker picked up the win. Mankind, with his dislocated jaw and shoulder, two broken ribs,
a cut lip that necessitated 14 stitches and a concussion, had to settle for picking up his teeth – one of which exited
through his nose.
After such a harrowing experience, it’s downright disturbing that another of Mick Foley’s three faces –
in this instance, Cactus Jack – would voluntarily enter Hell in a Cell again. Yet he did so at February 2000’s
No Way Out, with Triple H’s WWE Championship on the line. Besides enduring another broken Spanish announcers’
table, thousands of thumbtacks, and blazing barb-wired 2x4’s, Jack would take another express trip through the cage
roof, and this time break through the canvas. Another loss accompanied a prearranged stipulation which forced Cactus to retire
from the ring. Then again, one could argue that this was the only Hell in a Cell contest with an end result that may have
prolonged someone’s health.
Sadly, even referees are prospective victims inside “Hell.” Some believe it’s because the Cell, unlike traditional
roofless cages, encase not only the ring, but all sides of the immediate surrounding area. That extra gap allows Superstars
to viciously vent their aggression on the outside floor, find more potential weapons to use and ultimately create more mayhem.
Former WWE official Tim White knows all too well what kind of suffering “Hell” can cause; during Triple H’s
contest against Chris Jericho at Judgment Day in May 2002, he was violently thrown into the unyielding enclosure, ending his
career as a referee.
“There’s going to be one winner, but everyone’s going to get hurt and no one gets out until it’s done,”
White told WWE.com in 2006. “Inside Hell in a Cell, there’s nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, no one to save you….
It’s the most brutal match WWE has.”
While Undertaker may share the most journeys into “Hell” with The Game, his Survivor Series opponent isn’t
entirely unfamiliar with the structure. Batista first entered the Cell at June 2004’s Bad Blood, though it was simply
to help an exhausted Triple H leave after a grueling, crimson-drenched victory over Shawn Michaels. Two months after winning
the World Heavyweight Title from the former Evolution leader at WrestleMania 22, The Animal would make his own hellish history
at June 2005’s Vengeance; by withstanding sledgehammers, steel chains and even a barb-wired chair to the skull, he’d
become the only man to defeat Triple H one-on-one within the Hadean confines.
Of course, both Batista and Undertaker would do well to remember that a new level of “Hell” now exists, and it’s
more than a full man taller. Introduced at Unforgiven in September 2006, the 30-by-30 apparatus is comprised of 3,500 square
feet of remorseless steel mesh and support beams. Its first inhabitants were D-Generation X-ers Shawn Michaels & Triple H,
who needed every inch of the redesigned structure – and every weapon concealed within it – to beat Mr. McMahon,
Shane McMahon & Big Show in the only Hell in a Cell Handicap Match. The sold-out crowd in Toronto may have delighted in seeing
the WWE Chairman’s face swallowed by Big Show’s abyss-sized ass. Yet they – and everyone who watched from
home – equally cringed at seeing skulls wrapped around, cut open by screwdrivers or pulverized by sledgehammers.
Normally, our fans would relish the idea of a beloved Superstar stepping into “Hell” to make a universally hated
foe suffer. Conditions will be very different two weeks from Sunday, however. When Batista and Undertaker meet at this year’s
Survivor Series, it will mark the fifth time that two fan favorites have clashed in a single calendar year. That in itself
must represent a WWE first, but it also poses a problem. During their four previous encounters, fans knew that regardless
of whoever won, the World Heavyweight Title would be held by a worthy champion. However, inside Hell in a Cell, when one Superstar’s
victory could signal a very final defeat for the other…
Well, let’s just say that we’ll all be cheering if both men can exit the cage with their careers intact.
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Effective Leadership
November 4,2007
On June 2, 1925, New York Yankees manager Miller Huggins sat out regular first baseman Wally Pipp – a move attributed
to Pipp potentially having a headache that day – and inserted a youngster named Lou Gehrig in his place. Fourteen years,
2,130 games and a Hall of Fame career later, The Iron Horse retired having never missed another game, while Pipp became a
footnote in history.
In any sport, and especially in WWE, injury often presents an opportunity for someone to step up and shine in the spotlight
… but not usually when it comes to management. Then again, anything can happen in WWE, and at this point, after having
shown her mettle as Acting SmackDown General Manager over the last month-plus, Vickie Guerrero seems to be on the road to
sending Theodore Long’s name into the annals next to Pipp’s.
Okay, so Vickie may not be Lou Gehrig – she certainly has a long way to go to match The Iron Horse’s streak of
showing up to work every day – but in the six weeks since she’s assumed Long’s General Manager duties, Ms.
Guerrero has certainly shown herself capable of filling those shoes.
Just look at the many positive things that have happened on SmackDown over the last 40 days. Foremost, perhaps, is the working
agreement that she and ECW General Manager Armando Estrada worked out between the two brands. In just a couple weeks, Big
Daddy V, John Morrison and The Miz – all men who once called the Blue Crew their own in the past – have returned
to SmackDown to wreak havoc. Meanwhile, to paraphrase a classic song, the Land of the Extreme has gotten a little more country
(Jesse & Festus, Jimmy Wang Yang), a little more rock ‘n roll (Kane, Mark Henry) and this past week, a little of both.
In addition to giving her stars another avenue to shine down, Vickie Guerrero also has made some blockbuster matches on her
own brand. Just this past week, our fans found out that Batista & Undertaker would indeed battle in a Hell in a Cell Match
for the World Heavyweight Championship at Survivor Series. Putting The Animal against The Phenom is sure to create a memorable
match, but by facilitating Undertaker’s request and making it a Hell in a Cell Match, Vickie has ensured our fans of
an instant classic.
She has also shown the ability to think quickly under pressure. Like at Cyber Sunday, for instance, where it was learned that
Matt Hardy would be unable to compete just hours before his scheduled match against MVP. Instead of panicking, rearranging
matches or giving MVP the night off, Vickie gave you, the fans, the opportunity to choose the U.S. Champion’s opponent.
Poor MVP might be the only one who didn’t like that idea, but luckily for him, he retained the title.
Of course, as in any assessment, there are a few weaknesses to be found. Certainly Jamie Noble believes so, as his recent
string of matches against Batista, Undertaker and The Great Khali have been less than favorable match-ups for him. Of course,
Noble believes Vickie “has a crush on him,” and that’s why he has been tortured the last few weeks. But
in principle, he would have a valid argument otherwise.
Piggybacking off Noble’s issues, there’s the Cruiserweight Championship situation. Vickie made Hornswoggle abdicate
the title a month ago, a move she made for the little guy’s safety. However, based off of what our fans have seen on
Raw over the last few weeks – not to mention this past week’s SmackDown – it certainly seems as if the littlest
McMahon is fully capable of taking care of himself. Perhaps forcing abdication was too quick of a judgment?
Overall, though, it’s hard to look down upon Vickie Guerrero’s reign over SmackDown. Sure, even Lou Gehrig made
a few errors in his day, but when that day ended, a future Hall of Famer stood in the shadows. If we here at WWE.com had to
assign a letter grade to Vickie’s tenure as of today, we’d give her a solid A- …although now that ECW and
SmackDown are working together, perhaps Matt Striker might be better served to hand out grades in the future.
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What The hell,JBL?
November 2,2007
UNIONDALE, N.Y. – As Ricky Ricardo might say, JBL, you’ve got some ’splainin’ to do to.
This past Friday night on SmackDown, JBL interfered in the big tag team main event. Attacking both Batista and Undertaker
as they prepared to defeat Mark Henry & The Great Khali, he allowed Henry & Khali to leave The Animal & The Phenom decimated
in the middle of the ring.
One can only assume that the combination of his recent disastrous interviews and his poor poll results at Cyber Sunday have
sent JBL to his boiling point. According to SmackDown’s color commentator, however, the attack was about much more than
that.
“It’s very simple: I’m retired, not dead,” JBL barked after SmackDown. “I’m still a wrestling
god, and I’m still the longest reigning champion in SmackDown history. All of these great athletes you see on SmackDown?
I held the WWE Title longer than any of them.”
What JBL says is the truth, and he doesn’t think that anyone should be surprised.
“I’ve done this my entire life. In high school, I was an All-State football player; in college, I was an All-American,”
he recalled. “I’ve been a champion everywhere I’ve gone; Japan, Europe, WWE, you name it. I’m the
last person alive to beat a Von Erich for a title. I am still the same guy. Put me in a tie and a cowboy hat, put a microphone
in front of me, I don’t care. I am still the same person inside.”
So why go after Batista & Undertaker? Why attack them in the middle of a match?
“Have you been watching SmackDown?” he screamed. “Batista and Undertaker want to put their hands on me?
Well, that’s not fair game. Beating up Michael Cole? Fine, he’s probably used to that, he’s been getting
beat up his whole life. I am still the top dog; no matter if I’m retired, if I walk into the building with a walker
… I’m still the number one guy in this business. If these guys want to put their hands on me, they’re going
to be carried off like cord wood. I will leave bodies laying everywhere.”
Unfortunately for the World Heavyweight Champion and The Phenom, JBL says that the mission is only just beginning.
“Batista and Undertaker are not in my league, period,” he commanded. “No one in this industry is in my league,
and what I did tonight is prove that. If they want to bitch about it, I couldn’t care less. I’m going to call
the matches and do what I do every single week, but if they put their hands on me again, it will get worse. And it will get
worse and worse if they keep doing it. Boys, you can do a lot of things in your life, but touching me is not one of them.”
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The Gates has Opened
November 2,2007
UNIONDALE, N.Y. – Unable to compete on SmackDown because of the injury to his head, WWE Tag Team Champion Matt Hardy
made sure that he kept his “friend” and fellow champion MVP warmed up for the next time they team together. Matt
informed his cocky partner that he would compete in one-on-one action against Kane – the one man who seems to have the
Ballin’ Superstar’s number in the ring.
The United States Champion MVP unenthusiastically made his way to the ring for the non-title contest against the man who set
him on fire last December at Armageddon, while the Big Red Machine waited to gain revenge from Cyber Sunday. At the interactive
pay-per-view, MVP slithered his way out of the ring and lost the match by count-out, keeping his bling secure but igniting
the fires of Kane’s anger.
On SmackDown, however, MVP couldn’t run from Kane. The Big Red Monster physically dominated his reluctant opponent.
As Kane chokeslammed the Franchise Playa to get the victory, the presence of an even bigger Superstar was unmistakable as
Kane’s newest rival, Big Daddy V, made his way into Nassau Coliseum and headed for the Big Red Monster.
The two behemoths have clashed over recent weeks as part of the working partnership between SmackDown’s Acting General
Manager Vickie Guerrero and ECW’s GM Armando Estrada. After neither was able to win the Monster Mash Battle Royal this
past Tuesday on ECW on Sci Fi, their worlds collided once more as The Dominating Force in WWE viciously attacked Kane, leaving
the Big Red Monster down in the center of the ring. As the partnership between SmackDown and ECW continues, the gates of hell
have opened for Kane, who now has to watch his back at all times for the gigantic shadow of Big Daddy V.
But that also means that The Dominating Force in WWE will have to prepare himself to face the same reality MVP faced on SmackDown:
If you anger Kane, you will have nowhere to run from the sadistic, pain-inflicting Big Red Machine. The warning for Big Daddy
V is simple: If you play with fire, you will get burned. MVP found that out once again on SmackDown. And if The Dominating
Force in WWE ignores the past, he is doomed to repeat it. Maybe Big Daddy V should take a lesson from his associate Matt Striker;
he knows a thing or two about history.
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Smackdown Roundup
UNIONDALE, N.Y. – After three consecutive weeks of facing the biggest Superstars on SmackDown in The Great Khali, Undertaker
and World Heavyweight Champion Batista, Jamie Noble finally got to pick on someone closer to his own size – Rey Mysterio.
Actually, that was only made possible by Acting SmackDown General Manager Vickie Guerrero, who has “tormented”
Noble by putting him in the ring with giants. This week, Noble thought Guerrero had taken mercy on him and he looked to get
back on the winning track.
However, Mysterio had a plan all his own. With Rey’s rival, Finlay, observing things from ringside, the high-flying
Master of the 619 defeated Noble. Next week, in a Cyber Sunday rematch, Mysterio will take flight once more when he faces
the Irishman in what has become one of WWE’s hottest rivalries. Watch Finlay challenge Mysterio...
Pint-sized power
Last Monday on Raw, Jonathan Coachman was once again embarrassed at the hands of Hornswoggle, this time with Mick Foley as
the special guest referee. Coach demanded a match in Foley’s home of Long Island, and when “Mr. McMahon”
was announced as a guest referee, Coachman thought he had the upper hand. To Coach’s chagrin, Vincent Kennedy was not
the McMahon in his match – it was Hornswoggle. Displaying some of the “hate” that his dear old dad advised
him to embrace on Raw, the leprechaun helped Mrs. Foley’s baby boy defeat Coachman. Is this the side of Hornswoggle
that the Chairman wants to see or is the little guy bucking the McMahon way in favor of his own? Watch Foley vs. Coachman...
Gravy train
Festus has been a force in the tag team division since debuting with his partner Jesse, but on SmackDown he was in singles
action against Domino. When the match began, the normally benign Festus transformed and became a Superstar possessed, defeating
Domino as Jesse made sure Deuce didn’t interfere. With the loss to the red-hot “Biscuits ‘n’ Gravy”
big man, the boys from the Other Side of the Tracks continued to falter without the gold around their waists.
Back on the road again
After suffering his first SmackDown loss a few weeks ago, Chuck Palumbo returned to his winning ways when he defeated Kenny
Dykstra. The revved-up Superstar’s rivalry with the ever-game Dykstra has yet to see the self-proclaimed future Hall
of Famer create any speed bumps. But will Palumbo continue to ride the open road to victory on SmackDown?
Worlds collide
MVP’s on-again, off-again relationship with his fellow WWE Tag Team Champion Matt Hardy appeared off again when Matt
informed him that he would face longtime nemesis Kane on SmackDown. The Big Red Monster made sure that the Franchise Playa
wouldn’t find a way to escape his wrath, as he did at Cyber Sunday, by overpowering and defeating the United States
Champion in non-title action. Kane had little time to savor his victory as he was attacked by Big Daddy V, who left the Big
Red Monster down in the center of the ring. Read the full story…
Of gods and “Gods”
World Heavyweight Champion Batista told our fans his victory over Undertaker at Cyber Sunday left the two titans even in their
epic series of matches. The Animal then offered The Phenom another match at Survivor Series, and Undertaker agreed. But The
Deadman added a stipulation – his rematch with Batista would be Hell in a Cell. Later that night, Batista & Undertaker
teamed up to take on the super-sized tandem of The Great Khali & Mark Henry in a match that shocked our fans in Long Island.
Remember Your Visits Keeps Us Up and Running
Be Sure To Tune into Survivor Series on November.18 on PPV 8/5 Central PM.
Match's announced:
Randy Orton vs HBK(Shawn Michaels)WWE Championship match
Batista vs Undertaker(WWE Heavyweight Title,Hell in a cell)
Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match: Triple H, Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, Rey Mysterio & Kane vs. Umaga, Mr.
Kennedy, MVP, Finlay & Big Daddy V
The Great Khali vs Hornswoggle
The Miz vs. CM Punk vs. John Morrison (ECW Triple-Threat Championship match)
10 Diva Match(Beth Phoniex, Jillian Hall, Melina, Victoria & Layla vs. Mickie James, Maria, Torrie Wilson, Michelle
McCool and Kelly Kelly)
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